Tuesday, August 09, 2005

undisciplined

Sometimes I really have to laugh at myself because of the situations I put myself in.

Recently I've been learning a lot about discipline and why it's so important. I want to be disciplined in reading my Bible, praying, staying in contact with friends and family, sleeping, and working. I read something almost every day that reminds me that I should be disciplined and that it takes work but will pay off in the end. I've come to realize that I tend towards the notion (thanks to my upbringing in spoiled America) that I can have a high-paying job where I do not much actual work and get to take lots of vacations, and that I can have it NOW. Society says, "If you want it, go to the store and get it...even if you don't have the money for it." That's rubbed off on my view of life in general. It's very undisciplined.

Thus, despite my constant reminders about it, I still stay up until 1:30a.m. (when I have to get up at 6), play games instead of buy groceries or at least call my mom who just came back from a trip and had a job interview, and don't eat dinner (fried zucchini doesn't count as dinner, although it feels like it in my stomach). And what happens? I'm tired (although I amazingly was wide awake at 6...), I have no food (like...seriously in my refrigerator there's really old salsa that I should throw away, leftover baklava from Friday night, lunch meat, and a piece of American cheese. That's it. I'm dead serious.) including no food for lunch other than a sandwich, apple, and carrots, and I missed out on a lot of exciting stuff with my mom that I found out boringly via email. PLUS I didn't do any of those I-want-to-prove-I'm-disciplined things I mentioned above.

Why, why, why?

On a brighter note, I did put forth a lot of disciplined effort in finishing the Good Bias shrug over the weekend. I seamed the two sides (using Kitchener stitch) yesterday on the bus (well...I started it at a million o' clock at night on Sunday and finished it on the bus...) and just need to sew up the arms now. Yay!!!!

AND - this is unbelievable -- I called up WEBS, which is where I had put in my latest (June 22) and still standing order for yarn that was on backorder to make a skirt -- and it's in and should be shipped today or so. YAY!!!!! Now...I can start on something that I might possibly be able to finish before it gets too cold to wear. Brown Sheep Yarn Co. - I love you, but you really gotta up that production.

Wait...wasn't I just saying something about being a demanding American?

P.S. Check out my friend "Al"'s blog.

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