Wednesday, December 14, 2005

n e r v o u s

This is a little bit weird, but I think I'm as nervous at this very moment as I have ever been in all my days. Today is the primary inoculation of a bunch of mice I'm immunizing with a new vaccine protocol in the lab. I know how to do everything, all the doses are made...why am I so nervous??? I guess I just want it to work, and it's a lot of semi-dangerous organisms and chemicals, and I REALLY want it to work and not get messed up (yes, I do know that I mentioned that twice).

Interestingly, I have been sleeping just fine. Normally when I get stressed or am excited about something that I know will happen the next morning, I cannot fall asleep. I consider the fact that I have had no problem falling asleep when I get into my bed a huge step forward in my personal stress management. What have I done differently?? Well, on Monday night I wrote out the things I needed to do for Tuesday to prepare for this vaccination thing, and I journaled a prayer about them asking God to help me deal with them on Tuesday, and that gave me the mindset of "I've done all I can do about this today; tomorrow is a full, new day, and I will handle all these issues tomorrow." Last night...hm, I guess I just didn't think about it. I was happy that I had learned the proper vaccine administration technique and had calculated all the values of things I needed to measure out for the vaccine today - I knew that I "had all my ducks in a row". No need to worry.

It's T-minus a couple minutes here before I head over to the animal facility to inject and feed the mice... I am now feeling nervous, but I've written out everything I need to do, I have all the stuff I need organized and ready...I just need to chill out. Hope it goes well!!!

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